Posts Tagged ‘capital punishment’

Three Days After Execution, Homeless Man Rises

Sunday, April 12th, 2009

A homeless man publicly executed on Friday has risen from the grave.  A group of shocked onlookers ran in terror as he proceeded to consume the flesh of the living.

“He seemed agitated and disoriented,” said one onlooker.  “First he ranted about a bunny laying eggs and his twelve drinking buddies, and then he became aggressive and started biting people.”

Stampworthy sent three reporters to get the scoop, all of whom mysteriously vanished.  One of their taperecorders has been recorvered, containing the word “braaaiiinnnsss” repeated for fifteen minutes.

  • Categories

  • Recent Posts

  • -->