Archive for the ‘You heard it here second’ Category

You Heard It Here Second: Rock band uncovers gnomes’ secret plot to drown Earth in molten pigment

Monday, May 25th, 2009

Massachusetts’ doom trio Black Pyramid have uncovered startling footage of a secret, subterranean terrorist plot.  The evidence is posted below.  Homeland Security should fund their next album.

You heard it here second: Experts Agree Giant, Razor-Clawed Bioengineered Crabs Pose No Threat

Saturday, March 14th, 2009

America’s only reliable news source has proven itself once again with this lucid, insightful commentary on Giant, Razor-Clawed Bioengineered Crabs.


Experts Agree Giant, Razor-Clawed Bioengineered Crabs Pose No Threat

You heard it here second: Hitler finds out about new Watchmen ending

Wednesday, March 4th, 2009

Our comrades at Boing Boing have unearthed yet another important historical document.  Rampant neglect of capitalization, terminal punctuation and misuse of they’re/their, who’s/whose, and it’s/its aside, this is good stuff:

You heard it here second: Sony Releases New Stupid Piece Of Shit That Doesn’t Fucking Work

Tuesday, February 10th, 2009

This is true.


Sony Releases New Stupid Piece Of Shit That Doesn’t Fucking Work

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