Archive for the ‘Dinosaurs’ Category

Brachiosauruses suffered erectile dysfunction

Monday, June 1st, 2009

“We’re pretty sure they couldn’t get it up,” said Dr. Rodger Malmstein, resident paleontologist of The Dinosaur Museum in Blanding, Utah.  Dr. Malmstein’s research shows brachiosauruses lacked  sufficient blood flow to maintain an erection without resultant loss of blood flow to the brain.  “This solves the mystery about why so many brachiosauruses skeletons are involved in coitus,” said Dr. Malmstein.  “Many times when the male prepared to preform the deed, he passed out and crushed his partner.”

Dr. Malmstein’s has been researching the sex lives of dinosaurs for 16 years, ever since he read Michael Crichton’s seminal novel “Jurassic Park.”  “That book changed everything,” says Dr. Malmstein.  “The story and the characters were so compelling, but the thing that really got to me was the sexual tension between Ellie and the Tyrannosaurus–that transformed my career.”

Dr. Malmstein plans to release this and other findings in a new book later this year entitled “Dino-sores:  sex, STDs, and Prehistoric Animals.”

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