Werewolf sues NY over light pollution

An American werewolf in New York is taking the city to court over the effects of light pollution.  “It’s affecting my health and preventing me from leading a normal life,” said Hare E. Bach, the plaintiff who filed the suite.  Bach claims the luminescent glow of lights and buildings obscures moon light, which is vital to his well being.  “Things have gotten pretty hairy lately,” he said.  “I’ve been so depressed I haven’t taken myself for a walk in two months.”

Back claims he’s contacted the city on several occasions about the problem, but that no action has been taken.  “This law suite is frivolous,” said Singapore Hellsing, a representative of the city.  “We’ve heard hide nor hair of Bach until now and besides that, the green night sky is one of the defining characteristics of our skyline,” he said.  “There’s no single silver bullet that will solve this problem to everyone’s satisfaction.”

A judge will hear the case on the next full moon.

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